2010

I have so terribly neglected this blog, but it was Christmas and I was busy and yada yada yada. I had such good intentions when I started this space and of course, kids and work and my house and everything else keeps me from devoting as much time to it as I would like to. But there are things going on my life and in my head that I want to document and remember and I want to do that here.

Also, I need to hold myself accountable for some things that I want to change. I talk a lot about the things in my life that are less than ideal, but I rarely take any significant steps to change those things. I don’t know why- fear or laziness or whatever it is, I just seem to always be waiting for something to come my way, something to happen to me.  I’ve never been good at making changes and sticking to them. But I admire those qualities in other people- I really respect people that have willpower of steel and can make a decision to change something and then stick to it. It’s important to me that I teach my kids how to be strong and live out their dreams. So if I want to set a good example for my kids, I have to get some willpower and make my life what I want it to be. I want to teach my children what it means to persevere and be the best person you can be. I can’t do that if I never stick to anything, if I never work hard at making positive changes in my life.

SO even though I have NEVER made New Year’s resolution’s before, this year I’m going to do it. I’ve been inspired by Jennie’s list and I think that if I hold myself accountable here, it may help me stick to my new plan. I want to make some big changes and it’s going to take a lot of work.  But I think I can do it. I’ve done a lot of hard work in 201o. I’ve stuck with therapy, I made the decision to get medical help for my depression, and I think I’m much, much better for it. So now that I’m feeling so much better emotionally and I’ve been able to get some of my focus back, I think it’s time to take care of myself and some things I’ve neglected the past few years.

I’m going to make 2011 my bitch. Here’s my list. I’m going to put it up in a separate page and keep track of how I’m doing. I’m going to be accountable! So don’t laugh and link up your New Year’s resolutions!

1) Get a new job. By far the most important thing for me to accomplish this year. I need a job that fulfills me and makes me happy. Spending 45 hours a week doing something that I don’t love and that puts me under so much pressure isn’t working for me or my family anymore.

2) Get down to my goal weight–125. ACK! I was on such a good roll before the holidays and had lost like 15 pounds. I’ve gained about 3 back, which I guess isn’t too bad for making it through the holidays, but I have a long, long way to go. 

3) Work out for at least 30 minutes at least 3 days a week.

4) Stop eating like crap and stop drinking soda. That is all I’m going to say about that because the thought of giving up my caffeine and carbonated yumminess makes me want to cry.

5) Sit down and actually play with my kids more without being distracted by dishes or laundry or the internet.

6) Go on six dates with my husband. (It seems sad that in a whole 365 days I think I can only carve out six for a date with my husband. Oh well. Hopefully we’ll do better than six!)

7) Finish the kids’ baby books.

8 ) Read at least 2 books a month.

9) Write here at least once a week.

10) Eat out only twice a week (one lunch, one dinner with Hubs and the kids). And yes, I know that’s sad that I have to make that a goal, but I eat on the run A LOT.

11) Go out with friends at least once a month. I don’t get out by myself enough and I really don’t see my friends enough. This one is important to me.

12) Go on a vacation.

13) Continue with my treatment of therapy and meds. It’s working. I’m not going to fix it if it’s not broke.

14) Make a new friend.

15) Make two new recipes a month.

16) Get a second tattoo.

17) Buy someone’s stuff who is behind me in line/drive-thru.

18) Adopt a soldier.

19) Do better on blog commenting.

20) Buy new art for my living room.

21) Repaint my kitchen.

22) Buy my husband a really great just-because-I-love-you gift.

23) Buy an external hard drive and back up everything on my computer. (THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT. MUST DO THIS ASAP)

24) Buy a plant for the inside of my house and keep it alive for longer than a month.

25) Stop stressing about money. HA. HA. HA.

26) Pay off our credit card.

27) Get Tessa to sleep through the night. Consistently. Please OMG please let this happen.

28) Find a way to volunteer with Nolan.

29) Keep going to the new church we’ve found and become members. Also- get Tessa baptized.

30) Read more about current affairs/politics.

2010 was a good year. It was the best year I’ve had since my brother died. But it was still hard. So I’m really hoping that 2011 is hard in a good way–hard because I’ve worked hard at making myself better and making life better for my family.

I hope you had a d happy New Year’s Eve and that your 2011 is fabulous!