Write on Edge – #1

11 Oct

I’m participating in Write on Edge this week, a new website I was alerted to my someone in my writing group and it’s such a cool idea. They give you two writing prompts a week and then everyone links up two days a week. It will be a really awesome way for me to flex my writing muscles! This week’s prompt was this:

In “On Writing” Stephen King wrote, “The scariest moment is always just before you start. After that, things can only get better.” Write a memoir post – first-person and true – inspired by that statement. Word limit is 300.

So this is the brief story about the first time I called the man who is now my husband.

I walk down the hall and sneak into a room where I know I won’t be bothered. I clutch the phone in my hand and flip it open. Scrolling through my contact list, I stop on his name.

My finger hesitates over the green call button. Could I do this? Do I want to do this? I know what will happen if I make this call. Things will change. But I know how I’ve felt about him all of my life. I know how good he looked last weekend, how I tried to arrange myself to be closer to him, how I came up with excuse after excuse to talk to him.

I think I know how he feels about me. I know that when he gave me his number, his intention was never so that “We could all” get together. When we said goodbye, there was nothing final about it.

The desire to talk to him one more time, to see him, even, has brought me here and I don’t think I’m going to be able to fight against it.

But still. I probably shouldn’t do this. The other he in my life won’t understand. But the anger at him boils up, fresh and raw, and I know, in the most important part of my soul, the part that rarely speaks up loud enough for me to hear, that he isn’t the right one.

Quickly, in a split-second of clarity in which I understand that if I don’t do it now, I’ll lose my nerve, I hit the call button. I clench my teeth, knowing there’s no going back now. Butterflies alight in my stomach and I feel kind of sick.

It rings. I hear his voice and I don’t have any more questions.

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9 Responses to “Write on Edge – #1”

  1. Heather October 11, 2011 at 9:09 am #

    Please write a novel. That is all.

    {{hugs}}

    • teri October 11, 2011 at 9:51 pm #

      Yes, I agree with Heather — write a novel!!!

  2. TheMHalf October 11, 2011 at 9:21 am #

    Delicious! The angst, the anticipation, the freaking out … I love it!

  3. Nancy C October 11, 2011 at 9:42 am #

    First of all, I’m so glad you’re doing Write on Edge! Hope to see you here a lot.

    Secondly, I think this is such a perfect moment to capture. I remember the first time I told a guy I was into him. I don’t think I’ve ever been so scared. In fact, I should have written about that.

    And finally, that last line? It lingers. It is so perfect and such an solid, complete, WOW.

  4. Nichole (@ITSMoments) October 11, 2011 at 9:48 am #

    You captured that nervous energy beautifully!
    We’re so happy that you’ve decided to join Write on Edge.
    I’m so looking forward to reading more of your writing!

  5. Life of a Doctor's Wife October 11, 2011 at 12:12 pm #

    Have I said lately how much I adore you and your writing? I do.

    This is perfect – I think it captures exactly a feeling of breathlessness, of being at the edge of a precipice. Lovely.

  6. Sue Robinson (@MotherhoodnMe) October 11, 2011 at 1:13 pm #

    This made me smile. SO glad you made the choice for yourself to call him and not worry about others.

  7. Melanie October 11, 2011 at 9:05 pm #

    This was truly amazing. You captured so well all those feelings we get before we take that first step into potential love. I was agonizing over my computer for about five minutes before I sent that first email to my now husband of ten years.

    Love your writing and welcome to WOE!

  8. Galit Breen October 11, 2011 at 9:48 pm #

    Oh my, this is so lovely and romantic!

    I adore the nervous excitement that you captured.

    And, of course, I adore that there’s a happy ending, as well!

    Last, but not least, so very glad that you wrote this week- welcome! 🙂

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