Archive | All About YOU RSS feed for this section

Curiosity Killed the Cat

21 May

Occasionally K from Two Adults One Brown Baby does a post I believe she calls “Nosy Nancy” (I’m too lazy to go look and make sure). Anyway, I loooove when she does that and totally stalk the comments on those posts.

I’m a naturally nosy curious person. One of my most favorite things in the whole world is going to someone’s house for the first time. I love to see how people live – Are they clean or cluttery (that’s totally a word)? Do they decorate or just throw random shit on the walls? How big is their house? Whose faces are in their picture frames? And on and on and on. I stop myself from going through bathroom cabinets when I need to use the restroom, but in all honesty, sometimes it’s hard not to peek.

I don’t know what this says about me. I’d like to think it says something profound about my nature – that I’m deeply interested in the human condition, and what makes us who we are. I think it simply means I’m nosy curious.

So, in light of this (possibly disturbing) information about me, I would like to ask you some questions, Internet, in the hopes that you will answer honestly and satisfy my disturbing endearing curiosity:

How often do you change your sheets?

I heard on the radio recently that the average is once every three weeks. I don’t want to offend anyone, so I’m going to withhold my commentary about that, but I religiously change mine once a week. When I get rich (ha, ha) the first thing I’m going to do is hire someone to change my sheets DAILY.

How often do you clean your house, as in dust, vacuum, sweep, clean kitchen, clean bathroom?

I do this once a week too and feel so … yucky … if I don’t get to it. Am I totally OCD?

Do you use plug-in air fresheners?

(You have to be thinking I’m totally crazy right now, right?) I ask this because my house never smells like an air freshener. Ok, that sounds weird. Here is where I’m going with this – some people’s houses smell so delicious all the time. Mine … does not, unless I have my Scentsy plugged in or just sprayed air freshener or something. I don’t think it smells bad, but it doesn’t smell obviously good either. Is there a secret? Is it all about the plug-ins that are continuously providing delicious smells? And here is something to FURTHER illustrate my crazy (as if you weren’t already convinced) but I once saw a picture online (and the internet NEVER lies, right?) of a plug-in air freshener that had caused a house to burn down entirely. Ever since then I have been leery of them.

Sometimes I see people with personalized license plates that say things like “BLSSD X4” or “LF S GOOD” or “LUCKY” and I think “Oh, how nice that they appreciate their life.” But most days I think “Yeah, right. Show-off.” Am I just a bitch or do you roll your eyes too?

I have no justification for asking this question other than I’m worried that my disdain for these types of license plates is an indication that I’m not very nice. Also, why do people get personalized license plates that say things like “YLW STANG” on their yellow Mustang? Now, again, I don’t want to offend anyone, but CLEARLY you are driving a yellow Mustang. CLEARLY.

Ok, back to my questions about your home. How small does a home have to be for you to consider it small? How big is your house?

I live in the Midwest, where I know a typical home is much, much larger than a home in, say, Manhattan. My house is 1250 sq. feet, 3 bedrooms, 1 bath, and I get a lot of comments about how small our house is. And it is, in comparison to  average home sizes in our area, but we wanted to be on the lake and had to buy what we could afford and have plans to add on and yada yada yada.

Ok, I think that will satisfy my curiosity for a little while. Bonus points if you send me a link to a post with pictures of your house!